How to Ask a Stranger for Help - The Muse

How to Ask a Stranger for Help - The MuseHow to Ask a Stranger for HelpLast week, I got two emails. On the surface, they were very similar- both messages were from aspiring writers I didnt know, both were polite and professional, and both were requesting advice and potentially an introduction to my editor.However, my reaction to the two messages was very different. I was eager to help the first person and annoyed at the thought of assisting the second.I couldnt figure out why, until I went back and reread the messages.The only distinction? The first person explained why she was asking me specifically for help- and I was flattered as a result. Meanwhile, the other person made his request with no explanation.So, what can you learn from this to make sure youre in the first camp? Identify the Reasonfruchtwein of us request favors from strangers at some point (if not often) during our professional careers. And we never pick the recipients of our asks randomly. Theres always a concrete rea son weve chosen someone, whether its because he or she has the right expertise, works at the right place, or knows the right people.But our mistake is assuming that our why is implied. However, this why is actually really important, as it gives you a chance to compliment the recipient while providing some context.Include the ReasonNext time youre asking someone for help (whether he or she is a stranger or not), make sure you provide an honest yet gratifying explanation of why youre reaching out.Lets break down the two most common reasons.Youd Like the parties AdviceFlattering explanations Im looking for insight into topic, and since youve got such a strong background into field, I thought youd be the best person to ask.Your impressive LinkedIn profile makes me believe youd give great feedback on topic.Ive been stumped by problem for a while I figured that since youre an expert in subject, you might be able to offer some help.Youd Like to Know More About a CompanyFlattering explanati onsBecause youve been with employer for length of time, Im confident youd be able to give me a really thoughtful, accurate representation of what its like to work there.I know you only joined employer length of time, but since youre working in the department Im interested in, in a position similar to the one Im applying to, with people Ill be working with, your description of how its been so far would be incredibly helpful and relevant.As a job title for employer, you clearly have a lot of influence, and Id absolutely love to get your thoughts on the culture, values, and work style.Put it TogetherSo, after youve clarified why youre emailing that person specifically and found the right way to phrase it, its time to weave your explanation into your request. Your best bet is using this templateIntroduce yourself + make your request + provide your reasonHeres what it looks like in action Dear Ben,Im a freelance web designer whos looking to transition to a full-time role. Since youve got a fantastic reputation in the design community and have worked with many of the agencies Im interested in, I was wondering if I could get some advice about making the switch. Would you be available for a quick phone call or answering a few questions over email?If youve got too much on your plate, I completely understand.Thanks so much,AjaNow that youve got this trick up your sleeve, your requests for help should definitely be mora successful.Photo of woman on computer courtesy of Shutterstock.